Diana's Musings: 2011

Thursday, November 24, 2011

My Body

What happened to the body I knew?

The one I used to have? Where by breasts were firm and high? Two babies nurtured and nursed and years gone by. Now not so firm and high but where grandbabies love to snuggle – right by my heart!

I do not know this body of mine now. It has aches, pains, and ouches in very odd places. Outstretched arms, once belonging to my children, no longer lift up. Now those same arms reach down to their children. Once lifting children was my life, now I settle on the couch, “come sit by me,” I say, “you are getting too big to carry.” Surprisingly, they come and snuggle in beside me to read a book, or watch tv, or show me their latest booboo.

I do not match this body of mine. Inside I am youthful, energetic, joyful, and full of life. What I see in the mirror is not me…who has invaded my body? I do not know her. Round in so many places that once were strong and toned, still long limbed but thicker than when I was younger. If I don’t put on my glasses I can no longer see me clearly at all…maybe that is my rose colored glasses…seeing out of focus.

When did my babies grow so strong and tall? In the blink of an age, they are now awesome moms, uncles, aunts, and mentors with little ones who look up to them now.

When did the babies turn into grand-babies? What is so grand about a grandma? I like being a grand-mom. It fits me. I have much more time to stop and watch the ants (although I draw the line at watching the snake), paint a picture, rub a back, cheer on a soccer player, kiss a booboo.

A new group of babies giggle at me knees, sweetly sing-songing “maw-maw”, “maw-maw”, “watch me”! I swore, when young, “maw-maw” I’d never be that was for old women. Grams – never grammy, g’ma, g-mom. Now maw-maw is the sweetest words I hear! I don’t mind at all!